My father got an iPad several years ago. I thought it was a good idea but it’s turned out to have ruined my entire family. It was my sibling that found out first, they were able to find various info on Facebook and emails. My father contacted an old “flame” via Facebook and we didn’t tell our mom because as long as he didn’t act on it we left him alone. Then I got a call from my mom, I have to go pick up my father because he totaled his car trying to get to this woman. By the way, he’s 74. So I had to tell my mom at that point. Since then it’s gotten worse and worse. He got hooked up with a catfish scammer and he was sending money, Western Union to her. Even though she had multiple aliases he wouldn’t believe it wasn’t real. He can say it’s not real and all the things he should say to convince someone it’s not real, but I saw his emailing her asking for her to quickly send a real photograph through the mail so everyone knows they are together. She began using our last name and they talked about how they were now married. She began a facebook account with pictures of my family home and using our last name as hers. I saw him on this site just walking by the living room. He refuses to admit this is cheating. It caused them to separate for a while and my mom to have a restraining order. My dad blatantly lied in court, but the judge saw through it. He ended up telling my mom he would stop and so she moved back. He lied. He has never stopped. He spends all night on porn and talking to these loser women who are just scamming him. I’ve been humiliated by all of this. He has lost all sense of right and wrong. I tired to take his iPad and he was so irate he let the air out of my tires. My family is disgusted by him. I can’t get the situation out of my head. He has just stepped up his game. He hides his computer, sneaks into the bathroom for hours with the iPad. He does everything privately so it’s not on his page anymore. His cheating, which he doesn’t believe is cheating, has ruined our family. To top it all off, he is mean and nasty to my mom, still. Now this woman has her own porn website too.
I have read many stories about FB and the many problems it has caused relationships. I am now separated from my husband with a baby and FB was part of the trouble. But FB is not entirely to blame. If anyone is willing to do ANYTHING that may hurt or cause the person they love worry then they shouldn’t do it…simple as that! The Information Age is responsible for most marital strife. It makes people too accessible. Marriages and relationships will always have ups and downs but it’s the people who understand that things do get a bit boring and can seem disconnected with our loves. People think if they start to look up that girl they obsessed over in HS or how about that pretty girl I worked with 10 years ago? Or how about that guy I crushed on in college…so stupid!!! I personally feel it is pretty pathetic to reach back into HS to try to hit on a girl you crushed on…I can tell you that I was the recipient of a message from a guy who told me how pretty I was in HS and would I like to meet for coffee…REALLY …gimme a break. Ummmm…nooo. He creeped me out. But my husband sent many messages to woman saying how pretty they used to be and how great they look…men are so dumb that they don’t know how woman interpret that?? Anyway, it’s simple..you love someone don’t lie….don’t deceive…if it’s something you can’t do with them staring over you then don’t do it! Whoever they are ..chances are they are not worth hurting a wife..husband or child over. They shouldn’t be worth it. If anyone is worth destroying your child’s family over then they must be pretty special.
My advice…once you start lying you will never be the same again and neither will they. If your married have a family page..if a woman or man wants to send something that may be inappropriate ….they won’t! Problem solved. And then you are standing happy with a united front:)
I’ve been in a relationship for over 2 years. About a year ago my boyfriend accidentally left his Facebook open on my phone. Trusting him blindly, I even told myself right before I checked his inbox “I’m sure I will not find anything inappropriate here”. Little did I know, I was about to feel the biggest heart ache I ever experienced in my entire life. There was this conversation with a certain girl in which he was being overly flirtatious, complimenting her and what not. I was devastated, I told him about what I read and he said he was terribly sorry and that he didn’t want to lose me. I gave him a second chance, even if that means risking my heart to be broken again. Last month I started having flashbacks from those conversations, I felt the need to test him and see if he had been faithful since last year’s incident. I asked him to give me his Facebook password, he agreed. I was scrolling down his inbox and was relieved I did not find any inappropriate conversation with any girl recently. However I kept scrolling down and I found the same conversations from a year ago. Turns out not only was he being romantically involved with one girl, but was also having sexual conversations with another girl, who he claimed to be his “bff”. It was like opening a healing wound. I knew this happened, I just didn’t know the details. But I needed to make sure he was being faithful, and also that the sex talking didn’t evolve into a physical encounter. I didn’t get to read all the way through cause there were thousands of messages with this person, and as soon as he realized I was reading that, and that he forgot to delete the conversation back then, he instantly deleted it and I could not keep reading. My concern was that they actually had physical contact, but she lives in another country, and I honestly never read anything written in present or past tense. It was always about what they would like to do to each other. For a period of time I felt disgusted by his touch, knowing that the hands he touched me with were the same hands that wrote such nasty messages to another girl. Don’t ask me how, but I ended up forgiving him and we’re still together. I will never trust him again like I used to, and I know the risk I’m taking by giving another shot to this relationship, but I am also deeply in love with him and I believe he loves me too. I can see it in his eyes, taste it in his kiss, and feel it in his touch. He can simply not be faking these feelings. However, I will never forget that feeling, of knowing he ever cheated on me in such an awful way.